


Lonely People Need Cuddles

by 13ineedpills13



Series: Obey Me! Main OC Stories [3]
Category: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, I Made Myself Cry, References to Depression, Self-Insert, Sexuality Crisis, Spooning, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:47:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26033698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/13ineedpills13/pseuds/13ineedpills13
Summary: "My lamb... Instead of pushing everything inside and appearing fine and unbothered, you can always come to us. I... I am sorry for not noticing how stressed you were. And I want to make up for it.""Simeon, you don't need to." Fulya smiled with a red hue in her cheeks, full of shame and guilt. She reached over to his hand and squeezed it a little, feeling the warmth and embracing it. "I... I'll get embrassed if you say that. I don't want you to feel bad because of my own problems.""...This is starting to look like a funeral home." Satan commented to ease the tension, and pushed her back on the bed by her shoulders. "...Try to get some sleep tonight. And I promise, things will change tomorrow. Maybe the day after. But... It will get better. I am proud of you for staying strong all this time, but you need to take a break before you need it."
Series: Obey Me! Main OC Stories [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1900720
Kudos: 18





	Lonely People Need Cuddles

**Author's Note:**

> Essentially, I need hugs.  
> And comfort.  
> And irl friends.  
> :(
> 
> A very self insert fic with my self insert OC, Fulya (as in personality and identity, but not appearance, age, or education levels).  
> A Turkish, bisexual and stressed woman with a bad case or internalized homophobia and self-hatred because of it. She fears herself, and her surroundings back at her home. She has unhealthy coping mechanisms and a general bad outlook in life, though she keeps most of it to herself and rarely speaks about it with actual people.
> 
> Fulya has very long (around her hips) pitch black hair and dark brown eyes. She wears glasses due to her myopia. She is a 22 year-old college drop out. She is 1.78 cm. (around 5'8 ft.) tall, and weighs 66 kgs (145 lbs).  
> She will be one of my two main OC's that will appear in my fics from now on, other than second pov or unidentified MC's that use they-them/she-her/he-him pronouns with no facial descriptions.  
> The second character will be male, though I haven't decided which one of my male MC's to use :")

Tossing and turning around in her bed, Fulya sighed and stared up at the ceiling quietly. She wasn't doing good, at all.

For a very long time, she had felt as if she was a person that couldn't ve fazed by emotional traumas. Scars. At some point, she knew that she couldn't simply end everything and had to go back and participate in the normal, daily life. There was just no way that she could dwell on something for very long, think about it constantly. Feel unpleasant things about it. She was strong. She had a life she needed to live.

But at night, these idiotic, weak thoughts swarmed inside her mind and attacked him in the places she was the most wounded in. Her mind would ache, and her eyes would tear up. Her throat would tighten, and her chest would begin to buzz. She would try to keep her bitter laughs and sobs in, but they would escape momentarily. It was just one of those nights again, where she felt hopeless. Helpless.

She snuck one hand under her purple pillow, which her head rested on and sighed at the cold feeling. Her mind would rage, and she would feel a strange fear. Unease. Anxiety. She would try to calm herself down, but things would only escalate. The more she told herself to get her shit together and calm down, the more she would feel that fear inside her bones.

Her eyes teared up with small tears, and she didn't bother to wipe them. Suppressed sobs left her mouth like a wounded animal, causing her entire body to feel hot and her heart rage agganist her chest. She wanted to cry, but today, the tear stock seemed to be running dry. She wanted to cry and relax, then go to sleep from exhaustion. But it was no use. All that came out was sniffles and whimpers. This seemed to alert one of the two people she shared a room with, Satan. Because all of a sudden, the lamp on the nightstand of the bed next to hers was turned on, and a messy blonde hair peeked up from the covers. 

Fulya quickly roll to her side, away from him, and pretented to be asleep. But Satan was too smart to know that she was awake, even when he is half-asleep and very bitter about having his sleep disturbed. He accidentally knocked the book on the nightstand, and it fell with a huge thud, causing the second person, Simeon, to groan and mumble something incoherent. Satan froze for a moment when that happened, and reached to the book once Simeon was asleep once again. Careful to not creak the bed when he got up, he slowly walked towards her bed.

"Fulya...?" He spoke in a whisper, her name coming out a bit accented. Fulya flinched, which gave ger act away. The orange-ish yellow light of the lamp was a bit enough for him to see the tear stains in her cheeks, and the redness of them gave her away. Fulya slowly turned towards him when she realized she had been caught. "Hello..." She also said in a whisper, her face an absolute mess. 

"Were you crying?" Satan asked adter studying her face a bit, and rubbing his eyes. His vision was a bit shaky, but at least he could tell that much. Fulya averted her eyes instantly, and sank in the covers immediately. "Nothing for you to worry about..."

"Judging from how you were crying your lungs out in a room with 2 sleeping people, I think it is something to worry about." He said nonchalantly, and sat down next to her. "What's wrong?" He said, and put a hand on her hair, rubbing it soothingly. His hand felt so warm and soft agganist her pitch black locks, playing with them as he always did when he read a book with her by his side. It always caused her to melt and smile, lean agganist him. Satan was always gentle with her, even if be was the avatar of wrath. They shared a weird bond no one else was quite able to solve.

Unable to keep her face from scrunching with another wave of tears and misery, the real tears started to flow down her face, as she let out a sob that echoed in the quite room. She reached over to hug his waist, and Satan gladly accepted it. He wasn't going to judge her for this, as she clearly needed support. He just pet her hair with one hand, and held her shoulder with the other. Hearing the sobs, Simeon too, woke up. He stared at them for a while in a sleepy surprise, before his mind cleared up. Should he interfere and calm her down with Satan, or leave it to him?

"Simeon, come here." Satan said quietly, while Fulya sobbed on his lap. Simeon nodded and got up, also opening his desk lamp and staring at them. He walked over there and sat on the other side of the bed softly. As the wrecked, stressed tears of the human streamed down and made an awkward, wet spot on Satan's lap, Simeon rubbed her back. "Shh... We're here, my lamb." He said with a voice far more gentle then her own mother, which only made her sob more. 

After a while, her sobs slowed down, and her head cleared up. Her chest wasn't lighter than any before, in fact it was heavier. Noticing that these two men cared about her enough to soothe her while she cried was a huge gift, a blessing to her. She rose up slowly, and sat down, facing them. She sniffled s couple of times and wiped her nose with some tissues she took from the box inside her drawer. 

"...I'm sorry for waking you two up." Her voice sounded far from usual. Instead of the usual, sarcastic and confident tone that didn't held any meaning at all, it was hoarse. Filled with sorrow, misery, pain. The weight of the thoughts in her head reflected on the tone of her voice. Her shoulders were slumped and her back was hunched. Her eyes puffy, almost looking like she was ready go cry again. She also looked a bit weirded out. Confused. She never had anyone rubbing her back or hugging he properly when she cried ever since her childhood. And even now, she usually cried by herself in her room for 5 minutes, until she calmed down and fell asleep.

The few times she had cried in public were... When her fellow classmates teased her over her fear of earthquakes and nudged the projector cord that was hanging awkwardly from the ceiling next to her desk, to imply that the building was shaking. They knew that her eye was on thar cord the entire time, but they still teased her for it. She eventually started shaking inside her own desk and her eyes teared up. She looked around in panic and try to everyone that if an earthquake was happening, because she swore she could feel the ground shaking.

She broke down, wept and wept about it. Thoughts of thar earthquake thar happened just two days ago, in which no one was harmed but everyone was in panic, flashed before her eyes. Hiw the ground felt like a buzzing telephone tor 15-20 seconds during that history class, how old this building felt and how exactly safe they were. Her English teacher had to calm her down and help her wash her face. She was nice. Very nice... The worst part is; The kids who teased her fear were all in their freshman year of highschool. 14 year-olds, just like her.

The other times she publicly cried was when she wept from stress before a math exam in 7th grade, the time when her apology and gift to a 7th grader she fought with wasn't accepted, and she thought she was going to be expelled for it in 8th grade, so on, so forth... Her body suddenly felt cold, uncomfortable. Her mind was a total mess and all over the place, she just wanted it to stop.

"...You can talk about it. If you want to let it off your chest. It helps." Simeon smiled reassuringly, showing that he had no ill intentions and just wanted to make her feel better. This caused a strange pain inside her chest, knowing that someone was out there, to give a pat on her back was a feeling she hadn't exprienced before. Something about the two of them made her want to open up. 

"I... I am scared." She finally said, hanging her head low. "But not of you. Or demons. Or Devildom... Ever since I came here I started to fear my own home, the human realm. That place is too stressful. Too complicated, and I have no one I can trust there. My own family is just a group of religious shitheads, I... I don't want to say I hate them. But I am getting more and more uncomfortable with the idea of seeing them again once this year is over."

"Religious shitheads..." Satan spoke, with a hand under his chin. Thinking of any kind of way that they could've interfered with her life in a negative way. While Simeon looked surprised to the remark, he didn't look offended of anything. He know exactly what she meant with that. Silence followed after that, and the trio sat on the bed. 

"People who only pray in times of need, decline the basic right to live when that person is different from them. People who bad mouth other people, be stupid enough to pay a church or mosque or whatever for their services..." She ran a hand through her hair and smiled cynically, frowning while doing so. Her voice was alarmingly calm. "They expect you to worship and think of nothing but god. And I don't like it. I fuckinghate it. I don't want to feel shitty about myself because of a book that has been translated over and over again in the span of 1,500 years, and it's not even clear if this aspect of me is "forbidden" in the book. This is like... Being angry at someone for being born with deafness. Unnecessary. Stupid. So stupid that I just want to scratch my head until it bleeds..."

She pulled her legs to her stomach and rested her hands on the knees. She dissappeared inside her loose sweater and long skirt. Those covered her completely, which made her feel kind of safe. Not because these two were dangerous people, but because she felt like this skirt covered her mistakes, her regrets, her shameful self better than anything. She ran circles on her knee with her finger while she spoke. "You... You don't need a bunch of complex metaphors to tell someone not to be a dick and respect other people. These people claim they know something, when in reality their head is emptier than Blockbuster's warehouse."

Her lip started to tremble, and her voice quivered. She put two of her hands on top of her gead, scratching it. "That's why... I'm so stressed. I don't want to go back home, to meet with those kinds of people again. They made my life miserable for years. My head hurts just from remembering their faces and the shit they did to me... But you? Devildom? You welcomed me better than anyone. You... You treated me like a decent human. Sure, I almost died a couple of times..." She laughed, it wasn't an amused one. It was full of pain.

"And I am still pissed about that. But... But at least everyone apologized. And tried to be better. They put effort in getting forgiveness from me. They... I... I feel like this is my own safe space. Where I can be happy for once. Instead of feeling like shit about myself, I would feel like shit because Lucifer took away my glasses as punishment of something like that." This time, she chuckled for real. Lucifer came up with simple and mildly irritating punishments for her. Just enough to distract her from whatever business she had.

"I know I'm really selfish. But I don't want to be rejected anymore. I want... friends. And I have them right now. I am happier than I ever was, knowing that my own mother didn't showed me any sympathy, d-decency... Shit kind of goes downhill when you combine everything with me struggling with accepting who I am." Her eyes burned and her vision blurred as she continued, feeling the tears welling up again. "But... The lords of hell understood that. Two angels did. Another fellow human did, hell, even the prince of Devildom and his butler gave a shit about me enough go treat me decently." 

She wiped her tears away, and laughed quietly when the two stared at her without saying anything.

"...Sorry. Sorry. It was stupid of me to talk about all that at this hour. I should just... Wash my face and sleep. You two should sleep as well." She said and attempted to get up, but was stopped by a hand on her shoulder. She looked up at the arm, and then back at the owner. It was Simeon, his blue eyes still made their colour known even in this lighting. A beautiful shade of turquoise. "My lamb... Instead of pushing everything inside and appearing fine and unbothered, you can always come to us. I... I am sorry for not noticing how stressed you were. And I want to make up for it."

"Simeon, you don't need to." Fulya smiled with a red hue in her cheeks, full of shame and guilt. She reached over to his hand and squeezed it a little, feeling the warmth and embracing it. "I... I'll get embrassed if you say that. I don't want you to feel bad because of my own problems."

"...This is starting to look like a funeral home." Satan commented to ease the tension, and pushed her back on the bed by her shoulders. "...Try to get some sleep tonight. And I promise, things will change tomorrow. Maybe the day after. But... It will get better. I am proud of you for staying strong all this time, but you need to take a break before you need it." 

Fulya stared back at him, and then felt a smile forming up on her lips, this time far from sad or bashful. It was a smirk instead, but a genuine affection could be seen from her eyes. "You see, I can't even see your face properly because of my myopia. You're just a head of blurry blonde hair, skin, and eyes. Same for Simeon... But for some reason, even though my eye sight is shit, my hearing and long term memory is amazing. And I can tell that you took that last line from a tweet I showed you around 5 months ago."

"You remember that, yet you can't remember what you ate yesterday." Simeon snickered at that comment quietly, which only caused her to smile more.

"...Hey, can you two sleep with me tonight? You know... You'll spoon me, I'll spoon Simeon."

"Why am I the little spoon?" 

"Because you look like the type to be the little spoon. Now come over here."

Both men chuckled after looking at each other for a brief moment, and agreed with the suggestion. Satan laid down behind her and put his arms around her shoulders protectively, while Fulya wrapped hers around Simeon's waist and put her chin on his shoulder. Simeon took a moment to adjust to the warmth and sighed in delight. The trio was silent now, with their thoughts going inside their heads like clouds moving in the sky. 

"...I just realized we forgot to turn off the lights." Fulya said with a small voice that almost sounded like she was keeping herself from laughing, so timid and so unlike her. They all bursted in a fit of laughter at that, their spirits lifted. And when the eventual dawn came, Fulya noticed that even though the bed was empty now, she felt better. Taking a deep breath of the cold morning air, she sighed and cracked her knuckles. 

She could go through today. With a genuine smile on her face.


End file.
